provided by Art Kewin / Divorce Road Map
People who cannot control themselves try to control those around them. Deep psychological needs underlie their attempts to control others. I no longer practice psychology, however it remains important to understand that control freaks always self-destruct legally and financially when negotiating their divorce. Then, for the potential control “enthusiasts” among us, I’ll give away the secret to protecting your kids and your money during a spousal breakup.
Control freaks can be very successful in business and in the professions. Successful people tend to believe their controlling ways are a big part of their success. Therefore, the best way to “win” their divorce negotiation must be to control their spouse, their kids, their lawyer, their spouse’s lawyer and the Court system.
Here is an insider’s secret about litigation: no one has control of litigation. Not the control freak. Not their lawyer. Not the court bureaucrats. Not even the Judge. No one person has control of the process or the outcome. Yet, all struggle to exert the most influence on how things will go and how things will end.
So, what is a control freak to do? Understand and apply these five golden rules.
I. Control freaks self-destruct in family litigation.
II. “Control enthusiasts” are much more likely to “win” their divorce negotiations.
III. Mediation and collaborative law are the only two dispute resolution processes that will give you maximum control over the process and the results.
IV. So if control is your thing, adopt a “control enthusiast” approach to your divorce negotiations.
V. Get the most control over how things will go – and how things will ultimately work out – by hiring a lawyer who is qualified to mediate and/or practice collaborative law.
To learn more about mediation and collaborative law contact Art Kewin, at [email protected].